My love, I don't know when your birthday is - all you once told me was that it was in January... So, here I am saying HAPPY BIRTHDAY, whenever that may be!! :) I remember you said you weren't quite sure what to do on your special day, whether to party or just get your important people together and do something.. but I hope that whatever you choose to do, you'll have an unforgettable day! :)
Let me just tell you that you're an amazing person that has so much to give. And I want you to never give up or to lose heart, cause you can do something great in this world!! xoxo

Thanks a lot, my love! I also wish you a veeery merry Christmas (though it's a little late by now) and a happy New Year!! I hope you got a lot of great presents and were able to spend a blessed day full of happiness and joy!! :) May all your dreams come true in the new year!!
I hope you won't be missing for too long, my dear, cause I love talking to you!! I wish you the best of luck with everything that you do and everything that you wish for. You deserve only the good things in life! :) I'm already looking forward to hear from you again. Thanks for everything you've done! :D
All my love and light to you!! Love you incredibly much!! xoxo <3

Haven't told you about some songs in ages, so I thought I'd have a lot to catch up on haha

Leona Lewis - My Hands, I Got You
Mario - Highway To Love
Owl City - Fireflies
Anthony Hamilton - Did It For Sho
Agnes - Big Blue Wall
The Veronicas - Faded, Speechless
Rock City - My Heart Stopped Beating
Kesha - Tik Tok
Taio Cruz - Moving On
Mandy Moore - Only Hope
Nasri - Can You Protect Me
Robin Thicke - Lost Without You
Shontelle - Battle Cry
Chipmunk - Oopsy Daisy
Lil Eddie - Second Hand Smoke, The One That Got Away
Travis Garland - Glow Stick
Rihanna feat. The Dream - Living A Lie
Mary J. Blige feat. Drake - The One
Lifehouse - Broken
Jamie Cullum - Don't Stop The Music
Sarah Brightman - Symphony [it's the cover of a German band called Silbermond - Symphonie. The German band sings it way better in my opinion, though you won't understand it thehe However, listen to it, it's way better than Sarah Brightman, especially the chorus :)]
Rihanna - Russian Roulette
Lemar - Black Tide
Keri Hilson - Alienated
Jason Derulo - Whatcha Say
Ginuwine - Last Chance

Ahh I see, I really hope that they'll hire soon, cause I totally understand how frustrating it can be not to get the chance to work somewhere where you'd like to. When will uni actually start for you? And, I don't know if you wanna tell me, but how much does it cost? Have you already saved up some money previously?

You don't have to apologise for not asking me how I was doing and so on, I can genuinely understand that you've had your own things that kept you busy and bothered you. So, really, don't be sorry :) I was like pretty shattered and kinda devastated in the beginning, when they kicked me out,and especially about the way how they did it. But now I'm okay with it and I can see the positive aspects about it. Cause that's pretty much all I can do: to see the good things. I've definitely learned a lot, even in the short period of time that I was there and I've excelled myself several times when I thought I couldn't. So, basically, I think I'm kinda proud of myself for hanging in there and pulling through, though I hated it there with the family. Thanks for your kind words, my love, they put a huge smile on my face! :)

Your reason why you want to do something creative is really awesome to me. I also wanna do something that allowes me to give something back to others, no matter in what way. I've always wanted to make a little change in the world and, I don't know how to say it, but I want people to appreciate the work that I do. So I gave myself two options: Either to do something creative and make movies for people to watch it and to give them something to be entertained, or to do something social and help people with diseases and problems. I think it's awesome that you have always known what you wanna do and that you stuck to it. You never let the people around you make you change your mind, which requires a lot of confidence and strength. Not even your mum was able to do so :)
I think it wouldn't be that bad to do commerce in uni for your mum, as long as you can do other stuff that you'd really love to do. What subject will you actually have then? I seriously hope it'll all turn out the way it makes you happy, cause you deserve nothing else. And you're absolutely right: You only got one life and sometimes you just gotta think about your own happiness first, instead of putting the happiness of others in front of yours.

Aww you don't have the tiniest idea how much your words moved me whe you said the part about me being a good nurse and so on. Thank you so so much, love. Actually, it almost made me cry, well, it definitely brought up some tears in my eyes thaha Sometimes people don't know what kind of small miracles they can make with just a few words like that, so, thanks a lot! :)

Love you with all my heart!! xoxo

hey my deary! :)
i totally understand that it's been taking a lot of your time to get a job. what kinda job are you looking for actually? i really hope you'll be successful soon!! definitely keeping my fingers crossed :)
and ehhh yeah, don't be shocked, my love: but i'm not in england anymore. i've been home for like a month now.. my host mum came to me on a friday night and told me literally that they want me outta their house, cause they don't need me. when i asked them why, they kinda refused to tell me the real reason. later ive found out that she read my journal and there i wrote that i didn't like the family cause they were very judgmental people and i didn't agree with the way they raised their children, respectively, they got to see their kids about one and a half hours a day, so they did not raise them, it's always been the aupair that raised the two kids. yeea, and so they kicked me out within like 18 hours. i packed my bag in the middle of the night and arrived back home at 6pm.. yepp. xD
now i'm also searching for just anything that i could do to stay busy till i'll apply for an apprentieship. actually, you know that i wanted to do something creative, but i've been thinking about it for a very long time and came to the conclusion that helping people and making them happy is actually what makes me happy. i'll apply to be a registered general nurse or something like that. being creative will always be one of my biggest passions, but i figured that it won't make me utterly happy in the end. so, what about you? do you still have the same plans? :) i hope your mum has finally seen how stupid her behaviour was... seriously, i hope so :) ALL MY LOVE, DEARY!! xoxo