Better to of loved and lost than to never of loved at all.

Written by sarahlouxx on October 11, 2009

I haven't wrote in a while, and i haven't really been on Dipdive much lately but the thing with this site is i know when i need to write down my thought's and feeling's this is the one place i can turn to.

When i write, i don't feel i need to think about what i am writing i just let my fingers combine with how my heart feels at that moment in time, So please excuse me if at any moment this blog doesn't make sense!

Iv fallen in and out of love, iv'e experienced the different between LUST and LOVE . You can love so many people in so many different ways, and you can lust for others in ways that never come close to "being in love"  But when you fall in love with somebody, your whole world changes. Your heart opens up in ways that capture every ounce of that other person, you begin to see life so differnetly, but for all the right reasons.

Falling in love is the most amazing feeling ever, and it isn't hard to tell when its real .....its like being offered the world  but having the choice of  the world and everything that surrounds or having them, and all you want is them! Some people feel it, they let it show Some people miss it , they let it go, some people doubt it, but they only doubt it because they don't know a thing about it. Some people  take it, some people try to but they can't fake it ,thats why when its offical you just can't walk away!  Because without them the world it seems such a colder, harder, smaller place to live in, Love is the most beautifull thing when its shared between two , and there is nothing in the world like being with your lover, nothing in the world like seeing one another, happy with the one you need the most.

I  recently lost the love of my life, my best friend, my compaion, my heart/body & soul.  I haven't experienced this much heart ache, and to be honest even thou its the worse feeling ever id put myself through this pain over and over again if it ment  feeling this "in love" this much love, i never thought it was possible to love one person the way i loved/love her!

I now no that i have to move on, even if it means without her, and it will be hard, harder than i thought , because i always saw  myself growing old with her, spending the rest of my life with her, sharing so many more life experiences ,marrying her, and having a family with her, but i guess you can't fight for someone that doesnt want you to fight for? 

I know that now i have to take things minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day, and with each breath , but she is my every breath so how do i do this?  I am going to use all my tears i shred and every ounce of heartache i feel to move on, i have to move on in order to survve, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, and yes i am killing inside but thats only natural after spending nearly 5 years with the women you adore,cherrish,love,respect,admire!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!