Blog Entry
Goodbye for now.
Written by zahd on June 29, 2009
My grandfather passed away last Monday, and I was the one who found his body.
I cried after I called for the ambulance. I cried when they brought his body to the hospital. I cried during the final rites. But now, when everything's over and life's starting to go back to normal, I can't cry.
I don't feel anything. It feels like I'm a robot devoid of any emotions. I hate waking up in the morning feeling empty. One of my friends told me that I'm just used to it eversince my grandmother's death 1.5 years ago. I beg to differ. I don't think one will ever get used to death. Especially of your loved ones. That's just... inhumane.
I'd rather be feeling sad and melancholic, than to be in the position where I am right now. So can anyone tell me what is wrong with me? I'd really appreciate your help.
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zahd
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adik-ct89 said on June 30, 2009:
first of all i would like to deliver my condolence for ur grandpa's death.feel sorry for that.then...here we go..! nop honey! nothing is wrong with u... it is a normal sentiment u have to go through. u used to say that "when everything's over and life's starting to go back to normal, I can't cry." yeah, i do understand when someone who's close to us abruptly gone, we having the most shockingly deprivation ever.we feel lost! sometimes it feels like floating in the air. but life must go on babe..
i through the situation same as yours 3 years ago.my beloved grandpa passed away just...a day before my SPM! The final examination which i must attend before entering the university. i feel like a thin silk that time. my grandpa who's always console me when i'm sad,who's taking a good care of me...suddently lost! i wanna givin' up life but then i roused to consciousness,what's meant to happen will eventually happen. i know that we have to leave it to GOD...we have to start the new ride but it doesn't mean that we already forget them. we can connected to them by a prayer. i dont know whether u believe on that or not but i really do...
ok dokay, hope that u'll resolute to face your future.
~lots of cares from malaysia!<3
AlyssaJade said on June 29, 2009:
hey sweetie, grief affects everyone in different ways and on different levels. You found your grandfather in a traumatic way.. my heart breaks for you. I know how you feel, i've felt both ends of grief - the crying, sadness side and the numbness, non feeling side, and there is neither no 'right' way.. I'm sorry you feel this way though and i'll pray for you. sending you all my love that the emptiness will leave and you can start to heal. xoxo
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zahd
Siti is a girl who is 21 that lives in Singapore. She joined Dipdive on January 22, 2009. The last time she logged in was on July 31, 2010.
on Jul 15, 2010 from web
Thanks for that, and yeahh he's constantly in my prayers. Insya-Allah I'll start to get back to normal in due time (: